“Is it the hair or are you looking old?” The fact that the person who asked me this question is still living and is not missing body parts essential to life has less to do with my good nature and more to do with the fact that I would rather not to go to jail for the rest of my natural life and also that he happens to be my one and only son. The hair in question happens to be extremely short and unrelaxed.

About five months ago I decided that I was tired of being a slave to my hair. The constant cycle of getting up half an hour earlier than I need to just so I can run a hot curling iron through my hair was driving me nuts.

The having to go to a hair salon and spend half the day there getting a perm every six weeks and sit underneath a hot dryer for what seems like an eternity was unbearable torture. The dizzying array of hair products you have to buy( from special shampoo and conditioners to moisturizers, sheen sprays to curling lotions, scalp creams to deep oil treatments but to name a few) cost a small fortune.

I woke up one Tuesday morning and said no more, I went to the same hair dresser who had been my partner in crime all these years in maintaining my permed do and asked her to chop off all my hair. She looked at me as if I had grown a second head. “Do you know that many women will kill to have hair as thick and pretty as yours, what are you thinking, you need to seriously rethink this, are you trying to look like a man and what will your man say?”

I stood my ground and after a few more questions about my state of mind she reluctantly began to cut the hair. I had to encourage her several times to keep on going till she got it as low as I wanted it.

I must admit it was quite a shock when she was done. I wondered if I had made a mistake, I had never won my hair this short before. I took a long hard look at myself in the mirror and realized that I loved it, I felt quite brazen and liberated and a whole lot of sexy. I thanked my hair dresser who assured me that my hair grew really fast any way and to come back for a perm soon.

I happily left the salon and marveled at the feel of the breeze on my scalp. I stayed in high spirits till I got home and my 12 year old son did a double take. “ why did you cut your hair mommy? I told him because I wanted to.

“Are you going to buy a wig now” I said no way he said “I really think you need to get some hair, long hair”. I asked him why, he said he thought I looked better with hair, women were just surposed to have hair. I told him not so that I felt really good with my short hair. He pondered on this for a moment and came back with “ this might actually work, you can now get a long weave since I have never seen you wear one before”.

I told him the short hair was here to stay. He said it was my head after all but felt I had made a mistake. His reaction really amazed me. At his age he had a firm idea in his mind of what a woman should do with her hair and preferably the longer the better as far as he was concerned.

I love the freedom I have with wearing my hair short and natural. It s extremely low maintenance, all I do is shampoo condition and after running a quick comb through it I am on my way.

My son however has not come to terms with this new look and takes every opportunity to encourage the purchase of some hair hence the dig about the short hair making me looking old. On this occasion I reminded him that I was very tired after I had spent the whole day cleaning the house and just finished making him a chicken casseurole so I had reason to look tired.

I informed him that if he has any hopes of ever having a woman of his own he needs to learn to keep his thoughts to himself especially when they have to do with a woman’s weight, age or yes hair whether it is long or short whether it is biologically hers or otherwise.